After months of speculation and a slew of photo ops to counter the suspicion, Madonna and Guy Ritchie are officially, unequivocally, and confirmedly divorcing. Who knows what the consequences of their splitting up will be. Earthquake? Floods? Another hurricane? Or…an emotional and entertaining turning point in a sold-out tour? Madonna perhaps may not be the best wife/mother/sister, but what she lacks in romantic capacity, maternal instinct, and filial compassion, she makes up for with dance moves and strobe lights. Referencing her now publicly estranged husband when singing “Miles Away,” the tune written in tribute to Ritchie, Madonna shouted to the crowd, “This song is for the emotionally retarded. Maybe you know some people who fall into that category. I know I do.” A crowd pleaser even in mourning, I think that’s what they call a star.

But even so, it’s hard to sympathize with the material girl when considering the possibility, or likelihood, that she orchestrated this whole fiasco herself. Of all celebrities, Madonna has always perpetuated herself as the self-made, well-aware, in-control star. No management rip-offs on her watch and you better believe she’s making what she intends to. When she wants to get out of a contract, she’ll burn a few crosses-and televise it.

So an announcement of this proportion cannot be just coincidence and if you think it’s just a moment of weakness, a representation of even Madonna’s ability to be human, I protest. The worst insult you could make to the woman is reducing her to being like everyone else.

Image courtesy of Popsugar.com