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Our love life can become our worst enemy when we simply refuse to accept that ideality does not exist in love or in (wo)men. Armed with highly unrealistic expectations, we easily fall into a trap of heartbreak and disappointment.
According to a study conducted by psychologists at Edinburgh’s Heriot-Watt University, romantic comedies pose a threat to human realities due, in part, to their unrealistic approach to love. This genre of cinema becomes a distorted role model for love-seekers, obscuring the lessons which genuine relationships can teach.
Renowned American psychologist, Dr. John Ryder, strongly supports Heriot-Watt’s theory. “Women always dream of that perfect romance. Hollywood delivers what reality can’t. Sure, these romantic things happen sometimes but rarely for sure. Then, women expect their men to keep up with the ideal creating pressure and conflict that otherwise would not be there.”
Yet, despite the negative implications that abound from such movies, not all romantic comedies are sugarcoated versions of reality. For example, the romantic movie, The Notebook, explores the relationship between older couples and highlights the importance of patience and perseverance.
With romance movies dominating the industry, it may be hard to break away from their enchanted lies, but it is essential to distinguish between what is real and what is not in order to live a happy and healthy relationship.
“It is not constructive for any of us to rely on movies or other people to set the standards of what romance is about, however we should all strive to create it ourselves. In that case, romantic stories are very good to inspire and give men and women ideas of what is possible,” Ryder concludes.
4:38 pm on January 30th, 2010
I think most movies and television shows are pretty negative stuff. At worst they're full of violence, tension, hatred and fear which are not good things to be feeding your soul on – at least if you want to be empowered and happy. The very best movies are inspiring, uplifting and teach you something in a way unique to the medium – the very very best – but most of the rest when not actively poisoning you are at least full of lies, a distorted view of the world. I think it's very important to get away from this subtler poison and start controlling the viewpoints you let into your life, because this is basically a world of illusion and the masses don't see things as they really are. You really need to search to find a viewpoint which is not biased with cultural conditioning or just a way of avoiding or denying the world as it is – you can find them though, and they are so worth looking for.
By the way, my site (click the link on my name) is about finding truth, I think I'm quite a good teacher on the subject
Love
Andrew